Have you ever had the experience of wanting to do something, but you didn’t have a clue when you would fit it into your schedule? A friend and I were talking about spontaneity today. I said to her that I recalled a time, when friends/neighbors would show up on your doorstep and you’d have a cup of coffee together, ok, maybe a beer or a glass a wine, would be more in keeping with my group! Just depends on the time of day. My friend and I were planning out the rest of our exercise week…yeah, so much for spontaneity! Mondays look like we will work out before work on our own, then do exercise machines in the afternoon, Tuesdays, was something like running the stairs in our own homes in the morning, then running a couple of miles in the afternoons, Wednesdays was some sort of squat work out, and then taking a cardio-sculpt class in the afternoon, Thursday, again some sort of weight training in the morning and then a cycle class in the afternoon. Fridays – I haven’t a clue what was in the morning, but we were going to swim or run in the afternoon and then on Saturdays we were going to swim laps and take a water aerobics class. Just reading this makes me nuts and tired! But I will fit into a smaller size by this summer because I have 2 weddings to go to back to back in June and one of them is my son’s! By the way, in between our exercising, we work, and at least one of us gets paid to do so! Anyone want to join us? No? Ah, c’mon!
Still I have found time to read and this time in the book “Having a Mary Heart in a Martha World” by Joanna Weaver. Joanna makes a pretty significant point about being over committed. Now, her reference is pointed to serving God, but I think the point applies equally to anything we are over committed in! Here it is, “have you ever found yourself involved in a multitude of activities, that initially sounded fun or worthwhile and then find yourself disgruntled or everything about the activity seems to be a struggle?” Maybe as the author describes during one of her many volunteer ops, she finishes said activity but doesn’t feel God’s joy in her spirit. Upon further review, God even gently says to her spirit, “that the activity was good and maybe even important, but it wasn’t My plan for you.” She then realizes that just because an opportunity presents itself, it doesn’t mean she has to be the one to accept the responsibility for it. In fact, by her stepping to the plate so often, she may actually be “stealing someone else’s blessing by assuming she must do it all!” The bottom line in all of this, was to “wait” upon the Lord, to conserve energy and joy, until you are sure the opportunity is His desire for you. If you rush in, as I seem to do, I could be up to my eyeballs in the wrong project or too tired to be able to do the one I’m supposed to do!
Case in point, another good friend made this comment to me the other day….it was about my habit of rising to challenges as the needs of people arise. I don’t think I’m trying to “fix” the situation, but I am willing to offer an ear to listen and my hand to help if I can. Her comment wasn’t meant to stop me from doing this as much as it was for me to be aware that people can sometimes take advantage of those always willing to help and I needed to be aware that should my “spirit” need refreshing, it would be ok to take a time out. I am far from being wonder woman, and I’m far from being right in everything I do. My thoughts on this are really about wanting to make a difference in people’s lives. But the point was made and accepted. God used her, to bring the message to my spirit! The simple fact is, I can’t do it all! (nor do I want to!)
So how do we hear what it is and what isn’t supposed to be God’s will for us? It is kind of like when I start reading and then end up blogging. I begin by getting quiet and as I read, a thought about something I’ve read grabs a hold of me. I usually stop reading, haul out the laptop and before I know it, it has written itself (maybe it shows!) While I share these online, I also am printing them out with the hope that somewhere down the road, when Brent and Brooke are wondering who the heck I was, they can take some comfort in my anecdotal musings. I can hear them groaning now…. “Oh Mom!”
I’ll end with 2 brief stories. Nancy and I use to walk the track at our local YMCA and this was before she got sick. One of our conversations was about legacies and wondering what they would be. I don’t know that we ever finished that conversation, and shortly thereafter she got pancreatic cancer. As I delivered her eulogy, I remarked how I thought her legacy was one of love and family and commitment, and rising to the challenges without compromising her integrity.
Just last week, another friend of mine, had a health scare, also thought to be pancreatic cancer. Thankfully, it was not! She remarked after finding out that she did not have PC, (she is also a breast cancer survivor), that she was relieved because she still had so much she wanted to do!
So, what will our legacies look like? Endless exercise schedules, 50+ hour work weeks, over committed problem solvers, overachievers, underachievers or will we find ourselves refreshed knowing that we heard God’s plan for us and responded to His call as He wanted us to.
What day of the week is it? What is it I’m supposed to be doing? Maybe another cup of coffee and some quiet time is in order!!
Looking up!~ Barb
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