It was a very interesting morning of reading material parlaying into 3 aha moments. I am taking the liberty of addressing one of the readings by eliminating the word alcohol and instead allowing the sentence I am about to quote to mean any substance that alters us. “Years of dependency on “an agent” as a chemical mood-changer deprived me of the capability to interact emotionally with others.” Wow! To me this nips so much in the bud. Primarily meaning that we can’t cope with our own emotions, much less other’s emotions, so instead we try to deaden ourselves to such a point of not feeling. Why is this?
Then I got to the reading from “Jesus Calling” and got smacked in the face with my answer. Picture Him talking saying “Come away with Me for a while. The world, with its nonstop demands, can be put on hold. Most people put ME on hold, rationalizing that someday they will find time to focus on ME. But the longer people push ME into the background of their lives, the harder it is for them to find ME.” It continues, “You live among people who glorify busyness; they have made time a tyrant that controls their lives.” Moment #2 aha! When we are busy, we don’t have time for others, ourselves much less God and our busyness blocks our need to interact thus saving us from the emotional turmoil, both ours and others.
#3 Aha moment is either from Bible commentary from Joyce Meyer or from the Women’s Friendship devotional and unfortunately I can’t recall the exact quote but paraphrased it goes like this: You look at two pictures supposedly depicting peace. One is of a serene lake, with plant life etc. and the other is of a waterfall emptying into a lake. Then you are asked to decide which one is the more peaceful picture. Suprisingly, at least to me, it was the waterfall picture. When the explanation was given, I could readily see the reasoning, but it messed with MY thoughts on the subject. The serene lake is just that, serene, but without the opposition or conflict it is unmoving and stagnant. Wow, that last word really stopped me. The waterfall shows the conflict thus allows for the calmness of the rest of the lake to be able to enjoyed representing the peace. I was at the beach this weekend and took a picture of the sunrise depicted here. Without the clouds (conflict) this would not have the same dramatic effect. We need conflict. Hmmmm.
Now to tie the three together. Our busyness and our inability to place God in the center of our lives, rather than at its outskirts leaves us feeling at loose ends. We therefore find a method of medication to change us so that instead of feeling this lost feeling, we feel nothing and consequently do nothing and become stagnant in our approach. The waterfall is the motivation needed to propel us to move from our self-pity, but unfortunately we are becoming strangers to the simplicity of life instead buying into the culture of more that keeps us from satisfying the inner void we feel. That void was carefully created by the one who created us. It is very unsettling to be our own God. We weren’t created for that role and in our usurption (is that a word?) of the role, we are increasingly cognizant of our lack. It can be a never-ending circle unless we choose to stop it.
So many of us are hell bent on arriving somewhere, that we forget that it isn’t about the destination (stagnation), but instead about the journey (movement). We have unfortunately become experts in isolation believing no one is interested in us. We need to allow that our perceptions may be skewed, but the question is, are we willing to take the chance in stepping out of the confines of our walls? It IS a risky venture because others have the tendency to want to keep us in our places, so that they can feel superior. Our lack of trust in each other has led to our lack of trust in God, because we paint God into our human condition. He is NOT limited and yet we make Him seem so every time we don’t get our way because we place blame not on ourselves, but on Him. I can’t tell you why bad things happen, and they seemed to be happening throughout a grand portion of my life at the moment; but I choose to hold onto the hope that God has this covered and that this is just a season of my life. It is the conflict, from where peace will flow. For the longest while now, and the reason I haven’t blogged in quite some time is that everything seemed dark and foreboding to me. I was losing my way and feeling abandoned by God. Then a realization hit me, I was too focused on my problems, and when I adjusted my focus back on God, I realized that the solutions to my problems were not in my control, but in His. I had to release my grip in doing things my way and allow for the world to unfold as it will without me trying to play God. I was becoming increasingly depressed! Reaching out meant my pride would be challenged, it was, but it also served to propel me in the direction I needed to go. I am not a block of concrete, I am human and I have feelings and needs just like everyone else. Sometimes it hurts to feel, but the alternative for me is unimaginable. I have to be able to feel, to be able to relate. Our world was supposed to be about relationships and somehow we have lost sight of that, which is after all the journey segment.
But lost in our busyness is the essence of being, as depicted by this young boy, a picture of contentment in my view!
Looking up!
Barb
