Modern day take on the Prodigal Son

In Derwin Gray’s book, Limitless Life, he tells the story of John, Jacob and Jude (naming names, albeit made-up names) for the family featured in the parable.  John is the Dad, Jacob the prodigal and Jude the “good boy?!”

Synopsis “Derwin style”…Jacob comes to Dad (John) and says “hey old man, give me my stuff and let me live my life according to the way I want to (and by the way, this means now, I don’t want to wait until you die!)  Dad John sadly but lovingly grants Jacob’s wishes, and watches as he disappears from their lives.  As Derwin recants it, he (Jacob) heads to Vegas; living the high life until such a time as he no longer can sustain it.  Jacob then resorts to what most would, he tries to make a living doing whatever he can to try to save face and stay in the area of good times.  When Jacob finally realizes (with maturity – age?) he has turned away from the ones who love him (not just a good thing), he humbles himself and goes home, not to be confused with going home to reposition himself as a son in good standing, but instead to accept being near those he loves and to do whatever it takes to be able to just be in their presence.  Dad (John) is elated and runs to meet Jacob as soon as he sees him.  The clarification Derwin presents is that by running to meet his son, John prevents those “righteous” people from getting to Jacob first and sending him on his way as a no-good scoundrel.  John acting with forgiveness and grace blesses Jacob with immediate inclusion.  Enter Jude – the good boy- who finds his self-worth in being just that, good (read perfect).  Jude is a rule follower and isn’t too happy that the one who broke all the rules is now back in the family all hunky dory.  Jude is well, what about the consequences for what Jacob did?  Don’t you see that I was always good?  Shouldn’t being good be rewarded?  Jude, you see is what is called an excluder.  If you make a mistake, you’re out.  The question to be asked is, is it one mistake or a series of mistakes that throw you out?

Interpretation – God is the father (John), ok, that’s not a stretch is it?  He lovingly accepts us, waits for us, runs to us; however you want to classify welcoming us back from the divergent paths we feel we need to take to be in control (or out of control) of our own lives.

Which leaves two camps?  The Jacob camp and the Jude camp.  So, where do you find yourself parking?  The way it hit me this morning was that most people who suffer from life’s travesties, and specifically in the case of addictions because they purportedly have “chosen” their road; would find themselves in the Jacob camp.  The Jude’s are the ones sitting on their perches looking down their noses sniffing the air and saying the stink of the Jacob’s is offensive.  The “Jude’s” think and say things like, “so and so need to go to church, or they should see the hurt they are causing their families, or they should look at “me” as I follow the rules and live righteously and therefore am considered good.  The “Jude’s” judge and pass sentences of shame and guilt and stir up hatred and chaos while purporting to be “good.”  They have no time for anyone who has suffered life or its consequences.  This wouldn’t happen to them!!  My view on addictions is that some are more vulnerable than others, but I believe addictions to be a disease based situation and once ensnared in it's tentacles, there is hell to pay, much the same as trying to disengage someone from a cult.  We can argue about choices being made, but isn't all of life based on choices - so someone who smokes and gets cancer, or someone who overeats and doesn't exercise and gets heart disease.  Anyone? 

So, when a “Jacob” gets clean and comes home, too often the “Jude” doesn’t want to let them back into the flock, (instead holding the Jacob to the position of disdain or continued ridicule) because they can’t accept that the Father can still love the person who wasn’t perfect, and they get upset because they (the Jude) feels their perfection is being overlooked or worse yet diminished.  But I like how Derwin said it best – “One found his purpose and the other missed his purpose.”  Jacob found his purpose – to love and be loved by the Father, while Jude missed his purpose by being what Derwin calls a religionist (follower of religious rules instead of being amidst the love).

I love this quote by Derwin: “people who do not understand grace are quick to talk about their “performance” when they feel they’ve been wronged.”   In the above story, Jude found his purpose not in being loved by his Dad. He was spiritually dead, even though he was religious. Derwin goes on to say “Religion says, “I am a good person, look what I’ve done.”  Grace says, “The only goodness in me is Jesus; look at the good thing He’s done for me: He loved me.”

Whether or not we want to acknowledge it, we are all in the Jacob camp, we sometimes just don’t recognize ourselves because we make comparisons of our “worth” based on a set of rules rather than on love.  How often do we talk about our performances when we’ve been wronged?  We are Jacobs when we are Judes because we are in “Vegas” in our hearts, separated because of our inability to love others including ourselves because of our own sets of rules followed with the need to be perfect.

“Our purpose is not found in our careers, money, children, spouses or anything or anyone else.  Our purpose to be loved by God”, as Derwin so adroitly says.  Love is not bound by rules and yet I know that I too keep a list of rights and wrongs!

I am Guilty!  But on my way home!

The Debate - Whose way?

It’s a beautiful morning as I sit, sipping my coffee, immersing myself in the Word.  I was to be part of a Bible study last night using technology – Facetime, but the timing (my anniversary) and other technology (a traffic accident that took out a power pole) interrupted the process.  The plan was to discuss Philippians Chapter 1.

My mind is a torrent of thought in this regard and I’m afraid to start in one direction feeling that I might lose the other thoughts I have and not be able to tie them all in without writing a dissertation.

Here goes:  Religion is seemingly tricky.  Already I don’t like that opening sentence, because it doesn’t say what I really mean and I am afraid, it will turn you off.  Bear with me please!!

I was raised Catholic, meaning my mother was Catholic while my dad was Presbyterian.  In the early 60s, while attending mass, spoken in Latin, so I had not a clue what was being said, I found myself disinterested in the whole process.  What kid wants to go somewhere and watch a sermon in a foreign language? Ok, there might be some, but it wasn’t me. After the hour long mass, we then went to Sunday school.  In Sunday school we were taught all about sins.  What stuck in my mind was that if we missed church it was a venial sin, meaning we were bad, but not as bad as a mortal sin, which meant we killed someone.  I am oversimplifying this, but truly this is what I took away from Sunday school.  In essence, I grew up to believe that God was a punitive taskmaster, ready with the lightning bolt to knock me on my keister if I screwed up.  The operative word in the Catholic church seemed to be “don’t”.  Meanwhile my Presbyterian friends were learning how Jesus loved them.  Today, I believe that between my maturity and the evolution of the church, this might not be the case any longer, but let me continue.

So many years later, when I rebelled I stopped going to church altogether, claiming or so I thought, I didn’t need a God who made me feel bad, and one I could never relate to.  My college freshman roommate was what we called a “Jesus Freak” and I walked a wide circle around her and not very nicely, because it just seemed weird.  Don’t judge me, please keep reading.

I can’t say exactly when, but throughout my 20s into my 30s, I started maturing and I allowed that maybe God did have some benefit, but in saying that, I will also add that if it suited my situation.  At this time my mother was searching for meaning as well, having done some intense study in the Catholic religion and coming away with more questions than answers.  She would be reading books by Deepak Chopra, all the while saying that I was still too young to understand.  I laugh, because when she passed away last year, I was still too young to understand.  This is unfortunate, because it was a missed opportunity to relate!

But I have finally arrived I think.  Losing people to the great beyond has a way of making you stop and think, what happens when one dies.  What is the meaning of life...?

Do you know how I became a Christ follower?  I read the “Left Behind” series and got curious.  I then read “The Shack” and learned that knowing Jesus was more about the relationship than about a religious affiliation. That really intrigued me, especially coming from a background of rules!  Now some might find that blasphemous, but it led me to want to learn more which led me to the Bible.   I am only being honest.

This is what I take Paul to mean when he writes in Philippians 1 about being held in chains and others taking up preaching.  “It is true that some preach Christ out of envy and rivalry, but others out of goodwill.  The latter do so in love, knowing that I am put here for the defense of the gospel.  The former preach Christ out of selfish ambition, not sincerely, supposing that they can stir up trouble for me while I am in chains.  But what does it matter?  The important thing is that in every way, whether from false motives or true, Christ is preached.  And because of this I rejoice.”

I have always been afraid of sharing my opinion.  I was more or less raised to be a goody two shoes, never rocking the boat or in other words succumbing to my childhood religion of “don’t”.  Don’t think, don’t do (implied anything wrong), don’t say…just don’t.  I was left with a lot of questions that I didn’t ask, because I thought I didn’t know enough to back up my own thoughts.

So, in no particular order, I am wondering aloud –

The Message – this is the “now” version of the Bible.  Written in today’s vernacular, it is easily understood, and because of the way it is written, it doesn’t need the little notes explaining what a particular passage means.  Yet there are those who look at this version as a corrupt book because it isn’t the “literal” translation of the Bible?  My opinion…apply Paul’s message of “what does it matter, the important thing is that Christ is being preached!”

Joel Osteen – I have heard that he is a preacher that preaches prosperity.  I’m going to admit here, I’m not exactly sure what that means.  I have watched him and I am not seeing that.  Now I will admit, when I heard his wife, Victoria, make the comment about doing it for yourself, because God wants us to be happy…I was alarmed, but then I also hadn’t heard the full context of what she was speaking about. Did he or did he not attend Bible college?  I know I didn’t, so does that mean I shouldn’t try to share Christ? That said, I get confused when I then apply Paul’s message of “What does it matter?”  Is it because their net worth is in the millions?  When I have listened to his service, it always ends with get involved in a good Bible-based church.  Is it a feel good message?  I will admit that it is, but I also have found that it hits the nail on the head enough for me to say ouch, more than once.  Again, I apply Paul’s message!  Does a TV ministry just automatically bear the shame of Tammy Faye and Jimmy Baker?  I honestly don't know, I'm asking! 

I know local ministers who have had to bear the shame of their own misfortunes, just saying...I am grateful not to have to be the judge!  I only have to look within and see my own shortcomings!  Who is legitimate?  I base everything I hear on what the Good Book says, no one is always right, except the author of the Bible.  Funny enough, I once heard someone speak about their version of the truth?  Ummmm, am I missing something?  Truth doesn't have versions!
 

“Papa” – referencing God.  Some find this blasphemous.  How dare we relate to God in such a common way.  He is God.  This absolutely cracks me up, because have you ever heard anyone utter G-d damn it?  And we are worried with the familiarity of Papa – which is a translation of “Abba” which means daddy?  Hmmmm.  I love the idea that God who is our King, is approachable!  I love that even though I still have trouble with the don't ideology, that He will meet me where I am and love and accept me as the work in process that I am.

Elevation Church – This is an up and coming church based in Charlotte, NC.  My husband and I went to 2 of the services.  The music was so loud, my husband needed earplugs, but I loved it.  Steven, the minister, has a huge following with many church plants.  He has also written books and been on television.  He is a young, zealous teacher and yet, some find his teachings suspect but I believe it is because they are more concerned about the size of his house amongst other things, so they become suspect mongers.  Really?!!  C’mon people!  On the positive side, he is having a huge impact on the youth and he is applying the use of technology to draw them in.  I think this is wonderful, what does it matter, meaning the how…Christ is being preached.  Is there any correlation to his income and Joel's and that is the reason they are deemed questionable?  Or is it because the message being shared is non-traditional?

I believe that our filters limit us.  When we get use to a certain way of hearing God, we think it is the only way, because we are conditioned to it.  Think about it.  Do you ever go to church and find you are disappointed when the minister you like isn’t the one preaching that day?  I remember David Chadwick from Forest Hill saying something to the effect of, it isn’t about the minister, it’s about the message!  Isn’t that what Paul says?!  I can honestly state, I don’t always “get” the message, if I can’t or don’t relate to the one preaching it.  Maybe I’m just dumb, but I bet I’m not alone!

I believe ministry is a difficult profession.  The minister is tasked with the responsibility of God.  If the ministry is suspect, he then must account to God for leading people astray.  God is the judge, not us!

Finally, I will conclude with a fairly long quote from Derwin Gray’s book “Limitless Life”.  Before moving, I attended Transformation Church, which is an up and coming, multicultural, multigenerational, Jesus centered church. Derwin founded this church and it is located on 521 in South Carolina, just minutes outside of Charlotte, check it out.  This debunks for me the whole issue about religion versus relationship with Jesus and to that end, I will state, I’m NOT religious.

The chapter heading is From Religious to Grace-Covered and the subheading is Religion isn’t Gracious.

“When we live by religion, or works-based righteousness, we are never sure when God is pleased with our behavior.  We are never certain that we are loved.  How do you know when you’ve been good enough if His acceptance of us is based on our behavior?

The motivating fuels to keep climbing the high mountains are fear, shame and guilt.  This toxic soup produces a spiritual Ebola virus that slowly and painfully kills us.  Sadly, religion produces both pride and despair.  Pride says, “Look what I’ve done to earn God’s acceptance, love and blessings.”  Despair says, “I’m tired of trying to live up to God’s standard.  I give up!  I can’t keep the rules.”

Pride produces spiritually arrogant people who look down on others who haven’t climbed the stairway to heaven as high as they have.  Judgmental attitudes and condemnation accompany them the way a nose accompanies a face.  Pride also produces people who hide their sins from God and others.  When you live a performance-based life, you enter into a false “spiritual identity protection program.”  The religious person has an image to protect because he wrongly believes that God accepts, loves and blesses him based on his behavior.  If your behavior does not live up to the standard, then God and people will reject you.

Some of the deepest, darkest sin issues that I have counseled people through have been with longtime churchgoers.  When you don’t realize that Jesus is the basis of acceptance before God, you hide or protect your image through deception.  If you come clean with your issues, the jig is up and you are found out as not being perfect.  The gospel of grace informs us that Jesus went to the cross fully knowing our issues and imperfections.  And so on the cross He died for all of our sins – the past ones, the present ones and the future ones.

I no longer have to hide my sins, because God the Father’s acceptance and love for me is based solely and completely on Jesus.  I’m in Him.  And the more I realize this gospel truth, the less I sin and the more I grow up as a follower of Christ.”

Again, taken from Derwin Gray’s Limitless Life.

To that point – as we all sit in judgment of whatever is different from the way we think how Christ should be taught, I ask as did Paul – What does it matter?  The Hows, Whys, Wheres, Ways and Whens – Christ is being preached. 

I do understand that in 2Timothy chapter 4, “that there will be a great number of people who will gather teachers who will say what their itching ears want to hear.  They will turn their ears away from the truth and turn aside to myths.”  I don’t minimize this and I guess my point is that again, as Paul states in Philippians 1:4, God will sort out the reasons, but a dialogue is better than no dialogue isn’t it? 

Did it matter that my curiosity was peaked by “The Left Behind Series” and “The Shack” instead of religion?  Am I labeled unacceptable because of how I came to know Christ?  Or am I viewed as I should be, like everyone else, a sinner who found truth not based on my own abilities but only by God’s grace?

Looking up!