Attitude - a new one needed?

Do you know the story of Mary and Martha from the Bible?  Mary is the gentle, laid back woman who sits mesmerized at Jesus’ feet while her sister, Martha, complains about doing all the work in preparation for houseguests, namely Jesus and his entourage.  In Luke 10:39 and 40 paraphrased by me, Martha comes to Jesus and says “Lord, doesn’t it seem unfair to you that my sister just sits here while I do all the work?  Tell her to come and help me.”

As noted in the Woman’s Friendship devotional, Martha’s problem isn’t in her having to serve the meal, she is quite capable, no, her problem is in her attitude toward serving.  Further down in the reading, it suggests that she had a major attitude adjustment after her brother Lazarus died for 4 days, because once again, when she was serving a meal to Jesus, she didn’t stomp around her kitchen bemoaning her circumstances.  Death (even though her brother Lazarus’ death only lasted 4 days) had shown her what really matters.

At the end of the reading there is always a prayer and then a quotation.  I loved this one.  It goes “The higher and truer knowledge we have of the goodness and unselfishness of God, the less anxiety, and fuss, and wrestling, and agonizing, will there be in ones worship.”  Hannah Whitall Smith.

I can’t speak for anyone but myself, I admit to moaning and groaning when life seems too hard, or too unpleasant or when things don’t go the way I want them to.  As I mentioned yesterday, I am shedding my cocoon and in its shedding I will encounter trials.  And as the story goes about the butterfly, without the trials, I won’t get the caca off my wings to be able to learn to flap them and be able to fly.  Trials are to life as weights are to strength training, but at the core.  God is at the core, He gave us life, but we still are the ones who have to live it.

While I sit here typing this, knowing I need to gather up my stuff and head back from the beach to finish packing up the house for our subsequent move to the beach, I am dreading this endeavor, but to get to point C, I have to add points A and B.  There are no ifs, ands or buts.  Complaining about it only serves to make the task more difficult.

Dreading the task at hand doesn’t get it done.  I have said the serenity prayer 3 times today already!  “God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.”

Bruce is not coming back to life – I can’t change that and wouldn’t want to change it.  He is a treasure stored in heaven.  Selfishly I want him here with me, but to have seen heaven, there’s no way, I would want him to have to settle back into a world of pain and suffering, doubt and disappointment, sadness… I on the other hand, am still here and God is giving me the courage to step out and see the beauty that can exist amidst the heartaches described above.  Did you see the shift.  Heaven is perfect, our world is fallen, but with the right attitude, our world can and is beautiful. 

Am I fearful of changes? Absolutely, but I trust that God is leading me to a place of beauty.  Will it be perfect?  No, not until the day I die and enter heaven, but it can be pretty darn good, as long as I keep my attitude where it needs to be.  See, the thing is, my journey isn’t complete until God says so.  Could I have stayed where I was and ventured out beyond my home – sure, but I felt that God wanted me to take a different path.  Does it mean giving up the comfort of the “family” I have left?  Yes, but as I keep learning, painful trials are what makes you grow.  Without growth, there’s no life.  I have fulfilled my parental duties, we raised our children to the best of Bruce’s and my abilities.  Leaving them to stand on their own two feet (soon to be 6 feet per couple) isn’t as selfish as some try to make me think.  Rather, I hope to be showing them that life continues on.  That there can still be joy after sorrow.  That they too can not only cope, but survive and thrive on their own.

When health becomes an issue, the wagons circle for protection which is great.  But the pioneers of yesteryear, knew they had to keep moving on and as difficult as it was, they mourned and pulled up stakes and continued their trek to destinations unknown.  Without the brave doing so, would we have ever founded America, or California or any of the states in between?

We of aging parents or as the aging parent forget that as people we still have hopes and dreams and as long as we are physically able, we need to be able to live those dreams.  As children of aging parents, we wonder why they balk at our insistence to know what is best for them.  Really?  Didn’t they diaper us?  And while we may now be diapering in reverse, don’t think for a minute that they don’t cringe at the role reversal.  As a widow, I am grateful that my kids don’t look at me as being incapable, but many times that is the exact attitude that is adopted when a parent dies.

Attitude is the key to living life.  What does yours say about you?  Circumstances will be what they may, but we can choose our attitudes about the service we provide.

 

Looking up!

 

BArb